PND

1am-2am Reflux how I hate you!!

Im sat here at 2am crying sat in the spare room, whilst my husband trys to settle J.  J has spent the last hour screaming and thrashing around.  He wants cuddles but then claws and hits you. Im so unbelievable fed up of this reflux. I hate seeing J in pain and not being able to do anything.

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Its now 2.30 we now have tv on in the bedroom to distract J . It is slowly sort of working

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Its now 3.20 J has finally gone to sleep. Hopefully he will at least give me a hour . Im not even going to attempt to put him in his cot

Internet friends vs Real life friends

Nowadays it is very rare not to see a mobile phone glued to someone’s hand. Even then, if its not a mobile its a laptop or a tablet.  Now don’t get me wrong, I do believe that children nowadays spend far to much time using technology. Hey you cant blame them, it is fantastic. I remember when i was in primary school we only had one computer next to the headmasters office. I’m only 24, so not that long ago really.  Whereas nowadays its not a surprise to see a family out for a meal with their 3yr old playing on an Ipad, keeping them occupied.  I always said i wouldn’t be one of those parents, but in all honesty I probably will let J play on them when i need a minute to myself. (but not at meal times.)

There is a point to this post, and this is that the internet is an amazing thing.  Without the internet there would be no Facebook , and without Facebook we would all die!!!!. Ha ,no not really but without Facebook i would not have ‘met’ such a lovely group of ladies.  Some people say that internet friends don’t count, but in all honesty I would say my internet friends are my true friends.  I first ‘met’ my internet mummy friends (IMF) when i joined a Facebook group with other pregnant woman. It was actual a money saving baby group ,although I’m sure we are all a bad influence on each other buying things we ‘need’ BUY ALLDASLINGZ!!!!.  We started talking about general baby/pregnancy topics, including all the not so glamorous pregnancy symptoms . We soon got to know each other though and now we talk about anything. I would say that they know more about me than my real life friends.  Also without one very special mummy i would never have started this blog, i am so thankful for all the time and help she has given me.

When J was around 3months old we actually met up in a family friendly pub in Blackpool . Obviously not everyone could meet as we are scattered all over the country.  I was so nervous but when i was pregnant i said to myself that i have to make an effort to get out more and make friends. I wasn’t up to going alone as the thought of driving to Blackpool on the motorway with a 3month old terrified me. My mum came with me.  When we all met in person for the first time you wouldn’t have thought it . It was like we had know each other for ages.  I know that others more south in the country have also met up and i believe they feel the same way.

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When the babies were born we were all supportive of each other , those late night /early morning feeds can really take it out of you. You can start to feel so alone stuck in the robotic loop of feed,change,settle,sleep,feed .  I was so grateful of the random chatting’s at 3am just to keep me company.  We are a group of very different people, however none of us judge each other for any of our parenting decisions. Be that Breast feeding, Formula feeding. Feeding puree food or BLW. Pram lovers or babywearing . You get the point.  Without them and my fantastic family i don’t believe i would have got through PND and got to the point i am at now.  When i was feeling really low they sent me a surprise. It was a photo book of all the mummy’s and babies , with messages to me to help me feel more positive when i need it.

i just want to say a public Thank you to each and everyone of the Mummys

Lonely

Im sat here trying to stay awake so i can see my husband. I have not seen him since he left for work this morning at 7.45.

Im fed up of having to deal with bedtime on my own . It wouldnt be too bad if J stayed asleep but he doesnt, ive just had to settle him again now. Its not my husbands fault, he has spent a day at work and then gone straight to our new house to carry on fitting the kitchen. I am really proud of him and very greatful for what he does.  I know it is hard on him aswell not seeing myself and J as much as he would like.

I cannot wait for the house to be finished , and then we will be able to have spare time ,ha who has that with a baby, but then we can relax together

How I started babywearing – My story

When I was pregnant I already knew I wanted to wear my baby in a carrier. This was more for practicality purposes at first , mainly walking the dog, holidays in Wales etc.
I started to research about all the different types of carriers , I quickly realised that your standard off the shelf ones were not the best choice . They do not support the optimum position for your baby, and not only that apparently once the baby got bigger/ heavier they were not very comfy.

My first sling was a ebay cheapy mei tai, it was plain black on one side and red paisley design on the other. Mum and dad friendly :). This was easy enough to use with a teddy , however with a newborn I couldn’t figure out how best to use it.  This was later sent to Turkey to enable a friend .

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I also ordered  a black stretchy wrap when I was pregnant. When it first arrived I opened the parcel, I couldn’t believe how long the piece of fabric was. I immediately thought what on earth had I done. I then I got a teddy ( a very important bit of kit for any future babywearer) stood in front of the mirror and begin to wrap.  After a few attempts I got the hang of it , just had to wait for the baby now.
This quickly became my favourite wrap as it was so easy to put it on in the morning and just pop J in and out as the day went along, Even my mum carried J using it. My Husband did attempt to go out using it once, which I was impressed , he did however come back carrying J not in the sling as he couldn’t figure out how to wrap him back up .

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I then found out about sling library’s and started to fall down the slippery slope of collecting a stash of slings. I originally wanted to hire a buckle carrier for my husband as we thought he would find it easier.  Following this I bought a Connecta solarweave , this summer was so hot that I needed something light to carrier J around in.  I had already bought a Didymos Jakob as our legacy wrap , even though I had no idea how to use it ,but hey that’s what Youtube is for right ? .

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I have since bought a Wallabi Wraptai, this has quickly become my favourite. The plan was to sell the Connecta but my mum has decided that I’m not allowed as that is now hers. So this is how I now have a stash of slings.

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Considering I was only planning on using a carrier for practicality it has become a life saver.  The realities of having an allergy reflux baby soon kicked in . The early days are such a blur but I would not of made it through without a sling. They have seriously saved my sanity , as far as possible, and when I’m having a bad day it makes me feel so close to my baby that my heart could burst.